Fear Math

I have been helping out with my sons’ math homework here. It is fun to relive my glory days in math and engineering classes. I must say that some of these new learning methods seem odd and I am tempted to just have them use my memorized, tried and true formulas (the area of the triangle is 1/2 base* height already!) instead of graphing things and counting graph paper squares.

I have also been contemplating my fears on this trip. There are many new ones that crop up in places like this. I have reviewed my attempts and methods to manage my fear in the past - some were just laughable, like the “NO FEAR” that I scribbled in big letters on the inside of my baseball glove.

Getting back to the math connection, I often counsel people about risk to benefit ratios when discussing surgical operations and I think my mind just works in this mathematical numerator / denominator sort of way. I have been mulling a new equation and the best answer to this multiple choice question:

a) Fear / Love > 1

b) Fear / Love = 1

c) Fear / Love < 1

d) Fear / Love = 0

I guess there are various examples where each choice can be true. Choice A - when your fear of rejection is greater than love, you decide not to ask the girl out or you chicken out of telling someone the truth when they need to hear it. Choice B - a state of paralysis when you just keep thinking about demonstrating love but that desire is not greater than the fear or risk, and so action is not taken. Choice C -  when love overcomes fear and you step out, you rescue the person from the burning building or you help the help the person who you fear might take advantage of you.

Just yesterday I asked my son what Psalm 57:10 means when it says “your steadfast love is great to the heavens” and he said - “it means God’s love is infinite.” Hey, maybe my math teaching is going okay.

When love (the denominator) approaches infinity, Choice D is true. 

This was actually my original thought of a fear / love equation. I have made it through my time in this less than “safe” part of the world with this one verse in my heart from a great passage, 1 John 4:

“there is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear…” 

I keep telling myself the powerful truth in Choice D.  Fear / God's Love = 0.

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Say, in less abstract math - this sign sits right outside of our duplex. Marked by a prior Indiana team, as the crow flies, Indianapolis is 8980 km away. While our route is not exactly a straight line, that is a  [8980 / 1.61 (km/mile) = 5580 miles] journey that we’ll embark on later this week!

And, for more applied math, please check out this link, published on the BBC News website this morning. I'll look forward to sharing my up close look and perspective on this reality with anyone who is interested.

Five billion people 'have no access to safe surgery'

http://www.bbc.com/news/health-32452249

Broken

Well I have had enough orthopedics for awhile...

My time here has reaffirmed that I have found my true calling in general surgery and I am happy and at home operating in the abdomen. Partly this is because of the plasticity of the organs involved - infected or injured portions can be removed, healthy segments can be reattached and back to normal use in days. For example, a 12-year-old malnourished girl can arrive with a distended abdomen and four days of vomiting and a big scar down the middle of her abdomen. She or her mother will not know (will not have been told) what operation was done in the past. But, if you remove the chronic and now obstructing stricture of her small intestine (stripped of it’s blood supply in a prior bowel resection operation) and reattach dilated but healthy small bowel back together with her colon, she can be eating well within three days and asking to go home.  

However, if someone broke their leg last year and they were casted in a non-functional way or, worse, instrumented with hardware that is now infected or that didn’t result in healing - the correction isn't so straightforward or complete and certainly takes a whole lot longer. 

If they have osteomyelitis in every extremity like the boy in this picture (an all too common bone infection in the setting of malnutrition, poor hygiene and limited health care) - now you have mess on your hands. 

In many scenarios - for example when their joint hasn’t moved for years -  there is nothing you can do to fix it, even if you work at the Hospital of Hope. Giving this disappointing news is hard and is taken hard.

There are many examples of ingenuity and tenacity that you see in orthopedics though and it does appeal to that inner construction Mr. Fix-It part of you (though I left most of that part of me behind on roofing jobs during my Huber Construction days). 

There is also an amazing company call SIGN that has developed a system to place intramedullary (through the hollow marrow portion of the bone) nails in fractures in resource settings like ours. In response to reporting of data and outcomes by hundreds of such hospitals, this company generously provides the nails free of charge (http://signfracturecare.org). We have already placed several of these nails in my brief time here.

Thankfully we haven’t had any falls from mango trees in awhile - hopefully they are all picked for the season. Here is the boy and his dad who I mentioned in a prior post - at a clinic follow up visit. There is definitely a bright and rewarding side to the care of orthopedic injuries. 

A Day in the Life

A few of my family members, mainly my mom, have been asking for weeks what a “normal day” looks like for me and the kids.  So, here goes:

6:00am – I wake, hopefully before the kids, but the sun comes up around 6 too, so we’re usually all up soon.  I think the kids aren’t sleeping in much because it is usually pretty hot in their room, and once they wake, they are up for good.  Nate works out at the pool with a few guys some mornings, and on the other mornings, I try to go for a quick run (in an athletic skirt!! because we are in view of the hospital and women don't normally wear pants in this part of Togo) before the sun is too intense.

7:30 – Nate heads to the hospital for morning rounds followed by scheduled surgeries.  The boys walk to the sheep pasture to feed their beloved sheep.

8:00 – Kids start on schoolwork and I do a quick Bible time with them.  A few mornings a week, Denise, a Togolese young woman, comes to our house to help with some cooking and cleaning.  She is wonderful!  Her English is limited, and my French is even more limited, so it can be a challenge to let her know what I would like her to help with each day.  Typically, she sweeps the floor (the dust is unbelievable and builds up like crazy when the windows are open), washes dishes, washes and bleaches vegetables and makes a Togolese tomato and peanut sauce for us.

9:00 – I take Truman and Fiona out to swing or play for a break.

10:00 – The older boys need some help with school, so I distract Fiona with a tub of water on the back porch and she plays while I help Avery and Finley with their questions and work with Truman on his sight words and reading.

11:30 – The kids are pretty much finished with their schoolwork, so they read or play ipad games while I figure out lunch.  Even heating up leftovers for lunch can be an ordeal with multiple pots and pans on the stove.  I miss my microwave!

12:30 – Nate comes home for lunch and usually has an hour or so before he heads back to the hospital for afternoon clinic.  We are staying a couple hundred yards from the hospital, so it easy for him to go back and forth.

2:00 – While Fiona is napping, I try to prep dinner so we can be outside late afternoon when the temperatures cool a little.  I catch up on email if the internet is working and sometimes read a book aloud to the older kids.  Avery and Finn let the sheep out to graze and keep an eye on them so they don’t end up inside the hospital.  The boys have also done way more reading here than they would at home.  There is a small “library” at one of the nearby houses, books donated from all kinds of places, and the kids have read some really great books.

4:00 – We head to the pool.  It is tough to be outside during the middle of the day, so we try to maximize our time outside from 4-6pm.  The other missionary families who live in town or on the hospital compound are usually there as well, so the kids have friends to swim with.  There are twin 12-year-old girls, Abby and Ali, who love Fiona and are pretty amazing babysitters to her.  She usually prefers them over me when they are around.

Abby handmade this kitty shirt for Fiona...she is so sweet!!

5:30 – Nate is hopefully home to play baseball with the boys.  They love this time with him.

6:00 – Dinner, then maybe a game or movie or ping pong at the guesthouse.  Nate is on call every other day, so he is sometimes at the hospital if patients aren’t doing well or a new surgical patient comes in.  He operates after normal work hours only a few times a week, but the surgical volume is quickly picking up as the word gets out about the quality healthcare offered here.

8:30 – Boys head to bed and I spend at least an hour grading their work from the day and assigning work for the following day.  This has been more time-consuming than I expected.  Not having true homeschool curriculum or teacher’s manuals means I am reading the textbook to make sure Avery has all the facts straight about the French & Indian War.  At least I have learned a few things myself, including how to do that crazy lattice multiplication method that is so head-scratching to all parents of 3^rd graders!

So that's my life the past couple months.  The routine isn't exciting, but we have had some pretty memorable times as a family that will definitely be laughed about for years to come.  Because we are so isolated and recreation options are severely limited, we have spent a lot of time just...together, talking about patients at the hospital and what God is doing in this area of the world.  I feel like I know each of the boys better than I did a few months ago and going through their schoolwork with them each day has given me insight to their strengths and gifts.  These benefits help me keep perspective when I am dripping in sweat. :)

List

Ten signs that your family is in Sub-Saharan Africa....

10. It's hot. You can get sunburned in 30 minutes. It can be 96 degrees F at 8 pm (inside
      your house).

9. You only have brown eggs for Easter egg coloring. 

8. You have to move over for cows on your hike.

7. Your co-workers have names like Petro, Moussa, and Cherry.

6. Every Tuesday is “Terrible Tasting Tablet Tuesday” and every Friday is "Fanta Friday."

5. Fred, the pet chameleon, crawls across your dinner table and he is welcome there.

4. Baseball practice (usually in flip flops) is never cancelled by rain.

3. Your sons herd sheep on their bikes and enjoy mending fences. 

2. The tooth fairy pays in francs.

1. You see things that are best explained as miraculous.